Worth the Effort Ch. 06

"Sure."

"I'm sorry," she said, and her throat got tight again.

"For what?"

"For the things Brianna said." Morgan wiped at her eyes. "I just—they were awful. I'm sorry and embarrassed and I don't know what else."

"It's all right," he said. "I've heard worse." He moved her so that she was facing him, but his arms still around her. "I know it's hard, but you should put it out of your mind for a while." He kissed her forehead. "Want to watch a movie or something?"

"Sure." Morgan didn't care, but she needed to stop thinking about what had happened.

At least, she thought, I'm here with Shane.

x-x-x-x-x-x

The weekend passed before Shane heard from Evan. Shane had wanted to check in sooner, but knew that Evan needed time to process things, and that dinner was a hell of a thing to deal with, coming on top of the blowup at the wedding meeting. Even so, it made him nervous for Evan to be radio silent for close to three days, and he was relieved when Evan showed up at his cubicle on Monday.

"Hey," said Shane. "How are you doing?"

"I'm doing," said Evan. He looked stressed and exhausted. "Listen, can I come over tonight? I need to talk, and maybe a place to crash."

"Sure," Shane said. "Anytime. I can give you a key if you think you'll get out of here before I will."

"No, that's okay. Just let me know when you're heading out." Evan nodded and walked off.

Apprehensive, Shane made sure any tasks that might have required he stay late were finished by six. He hadn't liked the look in Evan's eyes, and something major had happened if Evan needed a place to stay. Almost on the dot of six, he left the office, stopping for pizza on the way home.

Evan was waiting for him, sitting on the porch steps, staring out at nothing in particular.

"Come on in," said Shane. "It's getting cold."

Evan nodded and followed him in.

"So what's up?" Shane asked he handed him a paper plate with a slice of pizza.

"I called off the wedding," Evan said. He stared at his slice.

"Wow." Shane swallowed his bite and put his piece back down. "You broke up with her after all?"

"No, or at least, not yet." Evan sighed and dropped his head back. "I told her after that last dinner, and her fight with Morgan before, that I didn't think we should get married yet." He looked at Shane. "It's hard to tell someone you love that they've done something you don't like."

"It is." Shane nodded.

"So, anyway, she got upset. I mean, anyone would be upset this close to a wedding when their fiancé says I don't want to marry you." Evan shook his head. "I feel terrible, and not just because of Brianna. Everyone's put money and effort into this: you, her parents, my parents, everyone in the wedding party. But I couldn't do it."

"I know it's hard to hear it now," said Shane, "but you are definitely better off ending a bad relationship—if it comes to that—than getting out of a bad marriage."

"Oh, god." Evan covered his face. "I haven't even thought that far ahead."

"It's okay. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to add any pressure." Shane bit into his own slice of pizza more for something to do than because he was hungry. Chewing and swallowing gave him a moment to think. "Maybe you shouldn't do anything for a few days. Just let everyone have some time to cool off."

"That's what I was going to do, since I couldn't think of anything else." Evan sighed. "I want to fix it, but it's hard to fix."

"It is, and I'm sorry to say it, Evan, but—you're not the one who needs to fix things."

"I know. I know."

They sat in silence for a while, eating with no real enthusiasm as both mulled over the situation.

"Maybe," Evan said slowly, as though he didn't want to voice the thought, "maybe we are just too different. Maybe it wouldn't work."

Shane couldn't speak for a minute. Evan's concerns matched his exactly when it came to himself and Morgan.

"Do you think it could work?" Shane asked when he had himself together again. "Do you want it to?"

"Right now, yes, I want it to." Evan nodded. "I suggested counseling, but she went ballistic."

"You know, I'm not sure I should give her the benefit of the doubt," said Shane, "but I can say that when someone tells you to get counseling or therapy, it can be tough because it feels personal, you know? 'You did something wrong, so you need to go talk to someone.' It almost feels like a punishment."

"I didn't mean it to sound like that." Evan looked stricken.

"Of course not, and it's not a punishment. It's a perfectly reasonable thing to do, and I think if you want to have any shot at saving this relationship, you guys should go to counseling. Brianna needs to understand why people are standing up to her. She is doing things wrong, but she doesn't need to be punished. She needs to know what she's doing so she can stop. If she wants to stop."

"Yeah." Evan sighed and stared at the table. "I don't know if she wants to stop. I mean, I don't even think she realizes what she does and says, not really."

"If she doesn't stop, I think she's going to find herself pretty lonely," said Shane.

"Yeah, I had that thought myself," said Evan. "I do love her. I don't want her to be lonely, or unhappy. But I don't think I can be happy with someone who thinks it's okay to put down her sisters, or order her friends around. What if she thinks it's okay to put me down at some point? Or what if I don't meet her standards, even if I haven't changed?"

They were lousy, sad thoughts, but Shane was glad Evan had brought them up himself. It showed his friend wasn't blind to the situation. Shane knew from past experience that when people wanted to be blind to things, they absolutely could be.

"I don't know, man," said Shane. "Not something you're going to solve in just a few days."

"No, it's not," Evan said. "Thanks, Shane. I appreciate everything."

"No problem. You can crash as long as you want. The guest room's a little messy but there's a bed and I think I can find sheets somewhere."

"I won't be in the way if Morgan comes over?" Evan said, trying to lighten things up.

"I can always go to her place," Shane said.

Evan huffed out a short laugh. "Maybe you should take our tickets and you guys can get married in Fiji."

"Married?" Shane stared at him. "What? No, we are not getting married. I mean, we haven't even talked about it, we haven't even said—I mean, that's just crazy."

This time Evan's laugh was genuine. "Geez, relax. I was kidding. Although methinks you protest too much."

"I'm not protesting anything, we are just not anywhere near that stage."

"All right, all right." Evan held his hands up in surrender. "Forget I said anything."

Shane stood up and started grabbing their plates. Paper, but at least they hadn't been reduced to eating on paper towels. He made a mental note to buy dishes.

"It's okay. Sorry, didn't mean to snap."

"Everything okay on that front? You and Morgan?"

"Yeah, we're good. I even finished her book."

"Yeah? What did you think?"

"I liked it. I think it's great. I haven't had a chance to tell her yet, but I will." Shane nodded to himself. He had meant to stop at the store and talk to Morgan, but then Evan had needed his help. He'd let Morgan know about that, and as he expected, she'd understood. She understood a lot, he thought.

"Cool, I'm glad you liked it." Evan handed him the pizza box. "I thought it was pretty awesome. Hope someone buys the rights, I think it'd make a great movie."

"It would at that."

The rest of the evening was quiet. Evan didn't want to talk about things with Brianna, and Shane let it go. He figured there wasn't much more to say anyway. Anything else that needed discussion would have to be between Evan and Brianna, and hopefully a counselor or therapist of some kind.

They passed the time playing video games and chatting about work until Evan decided he'd had enough and wanted to turn in.

"Thanks again," said Evan. "I really appreciate it. Hopefully it won't be too long."

"Take your time." Shane shrugged. "Not like I have a full house."

"You still planning on doing all the renovations yourself?" Evan asked.

"I figured you can pay for your room and board in trade."

Evan laughed.

"Anyway, yeah, mostly myself," Shane said. "My brother pitches in sometimes, and Morgan's offered to help. She said her friend Astrid likes to decorate, I thought maybe I'd ask for her thoughts on things when I'm ready."

"That's a good idea, I think you should." Evan nodded. "You need to be more social. You need more friends."

"I have friends, and I am social. I'll prove it." Shane opened an app and held up his phone. "The other weekend I went out with Morgan and I kid you not, we played Pokémon GO."

Evan couldn't hold back a deep, genuine laugh. "Seriously? You did?"

"I did. Caught dozens of the little bastards."

"I haven't thought of Pokémon for years. I used to collect the cards and everything. Did you, dare I ask, have fun?"

Shane gave a rueful grin. "You know, I did. It was fun to do something so goofy. I haven't done anything like that in, well, maybe ever. Ran into some of Morgan's friends from the store and yeah, it was cool."

"Good. You need to have fun." Evan covered a yawn. "Sorry to bring in all the not-fun."

"Don't worry about it. I told you, it's fine. I'm just glad—I mean, I'm not glad it happened, but I think it's good you postponed things."

"Yeah, I know it is, but right now, it sucks." He shrugged. "But the world keeps turning, and I still have to go to work in the morning. One day at a time, I guess."

"That's about it. Night, man," said Shane.

"Good night, and thanks again."

Shane went to turn off lights and lock the door before going up to bed. With Evan there, he was glad for the large house—it gave them each a bathroom and privacy. He didn't mind a housemate, but he was long done with sharing bathrooms.

He was exhausted when he at last flipped off the bedroom light and tumbled into bed. It took a while for his thoughts to settle down; they jumped from Evan to work to his parents to Morgan and around again. He focused on Morgan, as those were the most pleasant of the group.

Would he like living with Morgan, he wondered? Sharing his personal space? It didn't sound so bad, he thought. He imagined Morgan in the room off the kitchen, which was currently full of various tools but which he envisioned with a desk and maybe a drawing table.

She'd probably have boxes of comic books and Magic cards all over, he thought as he drifted to sleep, and that didn't sound so bad.