All Comments on 'Why Are You Asking Me That?'

Missing a few connections that would allow me to resolve the story.

Decent story, but ended way to quick. Maybe Angelica is single and has grown up and matured.

Where's the rest?

Good start, ends rather abruptly though.

The last two oparagraphs confussed me. It was shaping up into a good story, but Deerfield being one of the company's bestt what? I didnt get it.

What absolutely mindless drivel.

WHERE IS THE REST

Of the story?

Man, Pauline sure gets around!

definatly confirms JPB suffers from dementia.. seems to forget to complete stories or even complete various loops in the stories

Usually your stories dont cut off so abruptly

Hardcore way over the top also absolutely no pathos so it reads like a police report.

4 stars

I'm confused. The two times he met with the cops, both parties acted as if it were the first time they met. The "first" meeting took place in his office and you wrote the divorce was in process. The "second" meeting with the cops was at the hospital the night of the attack before he filed for divorce. So again, I'm confused.

Good story!

5

What an incomplete piece of Shit. JPB, you're losing your touch but that's only if you are the real JPB because this trash is WAY below your normal excellence.

Sorry, this is chapter 1, you have to remove the last paragraph/sentence and write the next chapter or couple of chapters. This is a great story.

Did JPB get bored writing this and decide to bring it to a hasty conclusion?

Would be good if finished

You need help

And..?

When can we expect part II? Good story so far.

Doc

That's it JPB? Seems to be missing the second page.

Rest of the story?

WTF, was this?

Read twice but left hanging at ending...

great start, keep wriing and add to this .. i am hooked

I think that this may be the worst story that Bob ever wrote.

Acid in the face for adultery. Not a fan of that.

Man, that sucked!!!! What happened to you?

uhm.

ending was abruptly cut off

whodunnit?

need more of the aftermath

at least no cuck

thanks JPB

You're better that this! This had all the ingredients of a great story but you phoned it in. Looking forward to future stories that are worthy of skills.

Usually love your stories but this one was just all over the map, very disconnected. Felt a bit rushed. No worries, will be ready to read your next one when it comes out.

Uh…..there seems to be more than a few things missing in this story.

An unfinished story

I think, in the second-to-last paragraph, you said, "... costs money which is something Carman does have." When you meant to say, "... does NOT have". It sort of changes things quite a bit.

Anyway, I always enjoy your writing so it's great you are filing out more stories. Cheers.

I liked it for what it was... the 1st part of an intriguing story !

At least, I hope that's what it is, as I could see a great JPB tale winding itself out into a longer BTB story !

Here's hoping...

EastCoaster

At the beginning of the story the detectives come to see him at work. At the end the same two detectives approach him at the hospital.

Seemingly a big disconnect. If there was something clever that happened in the middle of the story to make those two scenes make sense I missed it.

I marked this a 2 because the story's leaving the reading hanging: what happened next? What happened to Carmen, Deerfield, & her other lover? To her soon to be ex-lover? There're more questions not answered. Hence the 2 stars. Bob

Very funny at the end. A solid QuickMagazine 4. Nice, crisp, JPB, just the way we like him. Short and sweet. JPB.

Is there more? Seems like an unfinished story

Pretty nasty Bob.

Quite a few minor errors, but the plot just didn’t hang together. The MC gets introduced to the two detectives on two different occasions. Huh? The story had seeds of an intriguing plot, but it didn’t develop…at least for me.

Not a fan of the last few open ended stories of yours ; your such a great mental picture painter with minimal words that it’s an easy fun read ; also your recurring characters are always welcome like old friends that help pull you into the small part of the world you created ; and however you manage it your down to earth and plausible plots on the same theme are always fresh , informative , comfortable , and a uplifting high point to the day ; don’t automatically assume laziness on the part of your fans for the want of an ending ; instead it’s more a tribute to your imagination and craft that they enjoy your take on your characters lives ! Thank you for all you have and will share ! A#1fan

Feels unfinished

incomplete

Always well written prose, this one is a little short on the story arc. Who did it? Did he somehow get with Angelica? Seems like a couple pages are missing on this one - 4*

No vote, yet. I am going to have to read it again. Right now I honestly don’t know what happened, or how, or even why.

The cops spoke to him at the hospital, but had to introduce themselves when they came to his office?

\

Why does this seem chopped off?

No real ending?

No finish to the story? I noticed that you do not finish a lot of your stories, so it must be a waste of time to read them. FTDS!

Bob, would you please check with the folks at Literotica about why they only posted part of your story. They are usually very professional in their postings. I hope we can get this straightened out right away as I'm interested in how this particular story ends. Thanks!

Acid.......got a 1......

The jumping back and forth in time is annoying, but I gave 5 stars anyway. Mad props for being an asshole right back to the asshole cops. Mega kudos for the acid attack! Causing a vain woman to lose her looks is one of the best ongoing revenges!

ZK

This seems more of an outline than a completed story. Why are the cops talking to him like a suspect while the divorce is ongoing? No reason is given. They already had info clearing him from the acid attack, so what else happened? Mob hit? What?

This is a short blurb full of two dimensional stereotypes with zero substance. Very disappointing.

Incomplete. Did you just get tired and quit?

Rather disjointed.

This ranks with Honor killing and avid attacks on women. This is non erotic, unless you enjoy torturing women.

What’s next, killing the kids to get back at her? That’s what happens. Maybe laying in wait and killing the ex wife and her boyfriend!? That happens.

Divorce can bring out our worst but that doesn’t justify or excuse it. And if you have to resort to hurting someone through violence because your pride is hurt, then you deserve whatever hell you are consigned to.

On it's way to five stars when it finished midstream.

HAHAHAHA I'm laughing my butt off. JPB I love your stories. I do have an imagination and can finish some of your stories myself. I know you did this on purpose just so Harry in Virginia can scratch his bald head looking for his last hair to pull out.

Thanks for the tale! You are nearing 20 years Bob!

somewhere east of Omaha

Did you forget to post the story?

I dislike the story for the use of throwing acid, one of the favorites of radical muslims against their imagined enemies of Islam They especially like to target women. I hope the author isn't endorsing this reprehensible evil.

Feels incomplete; who was the guy with Carman? Were Frick & Frack any good detecting?

BTW; wondering if this sentence is right? "...that costs money which is something Carman does [not?] have."?

Would like to see a finished story. Of course it is obvious what happened, but still.

Continuation to my earlier comment.... Why let Deerfield off just because he is a customer? If you are going to go to such lengths as to have a wife disfigured, money would not be reason to let a guy off.

Well told mini-drama.

I'll score it when you finish it!

This wasn’t a story. It was an introduction to a story.

Next to last paragraph is confusing. I assume you meant it to read “but that costs money, which is something Carmen DOESN’T have?”

Ending

You apparently forgot the rest of the story.2*

Ending was rushed. Story not up to writer standard 2

When Carman came home from the hospital she found that I had moved out.

what kind of acid was it sorry but if she had acid thrown in her face she wouldnt be coming home anytime soon if ever.

That worked. There was one missing "not" that was critical to the story in the third line of the next to the last paragraph, but who cares? Acid is rough punishment, but I'm sure that plenty of husbands have fantasized about it.

wait what thats it lol wth was that why did the cops go to his office what happen after that? wth was that, think u might be a bit confused. well that was very weird u might want to seek some help medically or mentally or both.

I have low expectations reading a new JPB especially seeing the score is below 4. This was decent and I enjoy most of it but it needed a more complete ending to tie it up.

I used to like most of your stories. I HATE this one. Seems he quite the marriage too. He was her going to meet a man in a hotel room and did nothing. Wish he had been the one who got the acid in his face.

[Plastic surgery might help, but that costs money which is something Carman does have. And it is something she can't get from me thanks to a pre-nup she signed before we got married. And the really sweet part? It was something she insisted on. She was expecting to inherit a bundle from her father. Unfortunately, he was forced to file bankruptcy four years after we were married.] I think you left out the NOT in the first sentence. Still, it's your usual, excellent story. 5/5!

@whackdoodle is appropriately named. The dude is hypercritical and just ooooozes histrionics (maybe a menopausal woman?). Nothing is ever written to his/her liking. But when you look at the fucklechuck's profile... no stories. What a poltroon!

Where's the rest of the story? I see nothing to indicate multi-part. It just cuts off at a really weird place, even for if it was intended as a multi-part story.

You get a 1 for now, for submitting an incomplete and broken story. If there was a glitch that gets fixed and there is more to the story, I'll happily update my rating after reading the corrected version.

Once again JPB showcases his ability to underwhelm. No story here. Again.

One of Bob’s better recent stories. At least the cheating bitch got a little burn.

Fragments of a story. I agree it seems like pages are missing. Two different first meeting with the same cops, what did Slick Willie and the past have to do with anything? But the worst part is the acid attack, did this story take place in Pakistan or Afghanistan? Any husband that would scar a woman is far worse than a woman who cheats.

Eh not great. So basically carman and abdon got the acid treatment. Not really much if of a story. It is also a bit disjointed, when he meets the cops at the beginning he doesn't seem to know them, but he met them right after the incident happened.

Not a typical jpb story ,not usual quality

WTF?

This story is not done so I can’t rate it higher than three stars. I liked the direction you were heading.

Cold, But I liked it! Lol!

Great little BTB! No idea why people aren't voting it higher, would give it 10 stars if I could. Best JPB story in a long long while, by a large margin.

Bob, your stories are usually entertaining and well-written. But what were you on when you posted this? It was fine up to ... 'We could just take you downtown'. Then fell apart.

How can the MC possibly say ... 'I understand you want to close this case' - and - 'I hope whoever did it gets clean away.'?

He has no idea what they want to tell him. In fact - it seems that they never do. They might be there to say his wife has been a car accident.

In deference to your past submissions, I won't vote. It's unfair to give this a 1. Best just forget it.

i'm giving this a 2 dislike just because it is seriously messesd up in all regards. Finish this f***ing story and never write again!

Feel sorry for you JPB. So many readers who struggle with basic comprehension.

Is that it?

So far so good. FINISH THE DAMN STORY!!!!!!!!!

Too splat! Needs fleshed out.

Average story gets an average score, 3/5

unfinished,is ita series?

Okay, but the ending was left up in the air. Boy does Pauline French gets around!

I wish there was a “read but not rated” button. Nobody should get acid tossed in their face. Just seems out of bounds somehow, unfair as that is.

I wonder if he can write off the acid as a business expense?

One of the most frustrating things about J.P.B. is his tendency to end stories incredibly abruptly. When it happens it ruins the story and this is one of those instances.