Sugar Plum Fairy

I suddenly realised that no one was playing the Registrar. I nipped around the side and stood in front of the group. I took a couple of pictures of Sonja standing beside her father, the two grandmothers and the rest. I took more photos even when pretending to be the Registrar.

"Dearly Beloved -- I know it doesn't start like that but the important part is -- Do you, Sonja, take..."

Sonja and the grandmother played along in dumb show -- beautifully, including an air kiss. That was a great photo.

"And now the signing of the register," I said.

I moved to a mythical desk, wrote in a pretend register, and mimed turning it around for the Bride, Groom and their witnesses to sign.

I took more photos, including one of Sonja holding an imaginary wedding certificate. Sonja and the grandmother processed down the aisle, followed by Janet and the rest of the party.

As they exited the conservatory the grandmothers clapped. I had to be introduced to them and the others who hadn't met me before. One of the grandmothers congratulated me on my acting.

"It was so good to see someone taking charge, who knew what to do and wasn't afraid of making a fool of himself," she said.

I thought she must be the mother-in-law having a dig at Sonja's Dad.

Janet and I rearranged the conservatory to be the top table at the reception. We put disposable plastic cups for the toasts. We sat everyone down -- except me. I took more photos. We were waiting for the Mr Owens' speech. He was looking as if it was the last thing he wanted to do.

"Pray silence," I said loudly, "For the Father of the Bride."

Sonja almost pushed him to his feet. He produced the printout of his speech and held it in a trembling hand. His mouth opened and closed but no words came out. I took pity on him.

"We will take the speech as read," I said. Janet winked at me. "Please stand, charge your glasses and raise them. The Bride and Groom!"

"The Bride and Groom!" everyone except Sonja, the pretend groom and Mr Owens echoed.

"We will assume that the Best Man's speech with its awful jokes has been delivered, and a toast to the Bridesmaids. I understand that the Bride will respond. You will?"

"Yes, Uncle Stuart, I will -- on Saturday," Sonja answered clearly.

"Then the formal part of the reception is ended. The dancing can begin," I said.

Mr Owens slumped in relief. I was worried. If he was like this at an imitation event in front of his own family, what would he be like on Saturday? Janet hugged me and kissed my cheek. Sonja's bump pressed against the other side of me as she hugged too.

"You were great as Uncle Stuart," Sonja said. "If he can't make it, you'll do."

"Can I talk to you two in the kitchen?" I whispered.

Sonja nodded.

"In a few minutes," Janet said. "Mum wants a word with you. We'll get changed."

Mrs Owens came across to me as soon as Sonja and Janet had left.

"Thank you, Colin. You made a great pretend brother-in-law."

"I hope I don't have to be one on Saturday, Mrs Owens, but I will be if I'm needed."

"I haven't told my husband yet, but I think you will be. Stuart emailed me this morning. The operation might be tomorrow because of a cancellation."

"I'll do my best, if I have to."

"I'm sure you will if that rehearsal is a sample."

"Does your husband really have to make a speech? Is he up to it?"

"I don't know, Colin. He wants to, but the closer the wedding gets, the worse he has been. Today he was petrified."

"Is the speech very long?"

"No. Sonja and Janet helped him to write it. It might take three minutes. There's nothing embarrassing in it, just the conventional words."

"I hope he can, but if not?"

"We'll take it as read?"

"You're sure?"

"I think so. If he freezes it doesn't really matter. Sonja knows her Dad loves her."

"OK. If I'm being Uncle Stuart, and your husband does freeze, I'll take over."

"Thank you, Colin. I can see why Janet likes you."

Mrs Owens kissed me on the cheek.

"My daughters should have changed by now. All they had to do is take off the dresses and hang them up."

She went over to her husband. The two grandmothers talked to me for a few minutes and I went to the kitchen. Sonja and Janet were already there with a mug of coffee for me.

"I'm worried about your father," I blurted out.

Sonja's face fell.

"So am I," she said.

"Does he have to make a speech?" I asked.

"He wants to..." Bothe daughters said together.

"If I'm being Uncle Stuart, I'll try to make as easy as possible, but..."

"You're worried he won't be up to it?" Janet suggested.

"Yes. You two know your father better than I could ever do. How important is the speech to him?"

"I think he sees it as essential and part of his recovery," Janet said. "He wants to be a normal father again. He should give his daughter away and make the speech."

Sonja nodded agreement.

"Would it matter if he made it out of the normal order? Perhaps after the Best Man's speech?"

"What do you mean, Colin?" Sonja asked.

"I think he might freeze as he did now. If another speech has been made he might relax a little. In the traditional order he has to speak first."

"It might work," Janet said.

"If the real Uncle Stuart were to be there, he might be able to support your Dad better than I can. But he might not be."

"We know," Sonja said. "We haven't told Dad. He's worried enough."

"But you did brilliantly at the rehearsal," Janet added. "If you are like that at the wedding?"

"What do you think, Sonja? It's your day."

"Colin. What I want to do is to marry Brian. Nothing else matters. I don't care who gives a speech at the reception, or when. They're unimportant. What happens in the Registry Office is the real event. I would like my father to be beside me as I walk to stand beside Brian. That's all he has to do. I would like to dance with him, but if he can't? Nothing can spoil my day once I am married."

"But you would like your father to do the traditional things?"

"If he can, Colin. He won't be any less of a father. I won't love him any less if he doesn't give a speech. He wants to, even though it's tearing him apart. Just wanting to shows how much he loves me..."

Sonja was nearly in tears. Janet hugged her.

"He loves us, Colin," Janet said firmly. "We know he does. What he says or doesn't say on Saturday won't change that."

"OK. I'll do my best on Saturday. Remember, please, my main role apart from photography is to help your father. I'm not the main act, just the supporting cast."

"Colin?"

"Yes, Sonja."

"You aren't even Janet's boyfriend yet. Yet you are helping me, her and my father. Whatever happens between you and Janet, you're my friend."

"Thank you, Sonja."

"Do I have to be jealous of my sister as well as Julie?" Janet wasn't serious.

"No, Janet." I said. "They're my friends. So are you. We might be more than friends but..."

Janet kissed me.

"I know. We need time."

"And to get Sonja happily married on Saturday."

Sonja kissed me for that. Both of them were hugging me as Mrs Owens walked into the kitchen.

"Both daughters, Colin?"

They started to explain. Mrs Owens held up her hand.

"No need for words."

She joined in the group hug.

"Sonja," she said, "You should go to bed or at least rest."

"Yes, Mum," Sonja said ironically.

"And you two? Go for a walk or something."

"Yes, Mum," Janet said. "Come on, Colin. Get your coat."

Janet and I went out into the street. She grabbed my hand.

"If Julie can hold your hand," Janet said, "so can I."

Was Janet still worried about Julie? She didn't need to be. I squeezed her hand. She squeezed back and moved closer. Our arms went around each other's waist. It was more difficult to walk like that but pleasant.

We agreed that neither of us was in a Christmas mood, but we began to appreciate the Christmas lights on houses. Some of them were very basic, others were spectacular. There was one cul-de-sac where every house and front garden was covered in lights. The owners were raising money for our local hospital. I gave them a contribution. We joined the family groups wandering around.

The High Street lights were a disappointment. They didn't have a Christmas theme. They were just coloured lights stretched across the street. Some of the shop windows were much better, all on the Nativity, and competing for the Chamber of Commerce's silver cup.

We went into a coffee shop and sat side by side with our legs touching. The tinny Christmas music was irritating. It was an instrumental compilation of Christmas hits played on an electronic organ with an inappropriate techno beat. We tried to talk but what we really wanted to do was talk about us. We would have had to talk loudly over the music. We finished our coffee and left.

It was an anticlimax back at the house. Janet and I kissed on the doorstep and checked timings for Saturday. I walked back to my car feeling that I had a long time to wait until Saturday.

Once inside my flat I transferred the photos to my computer, selected the better ones and reviewed them. The best were of Sonja standing beside her father, and Sonja with her grandmothers. Their expressions were wonderful. I saved all the photos, closed the computer down and went to bed. Tomorrow evening I would email the selected photos to Janet.

On Thursday I tried to concentrate on work. I left the office late having achieved more than I expected. I know I was trying to compensate for not seeing Janet but once I had started sorting out a few office problems I became focused and involved. I emailed the photos to Janet at about eleven o'clock, just before I went to bed.

Friday morning Janet had replied by email. She was as delighted as I was about the pictures of Sonja and Dad. But she had news. Uncle Stuart was definitely NOT coming. His wife's operation would happen this morning and she wouldn't be out of hospital until Monday at the earliest. My role as the understudy was now real.

Janet's email rambled on. Like me, she felt I was being expected to do a lot for a family I didn't really know. Janet and Sonja would be depending on me.

I sent a hasty reply. Don't worry. I'll be there. I'll do my best for my friends Janet and Sonja. I added that I was sure that my sister Mary, the Groom, Best Man and the Groom's parents would all do whatever they could to make Sonja's day perfect...

Once at work my brain was still whirling.

Repeating what I had done at the rehearsal was no problem even if most of those present were almost strangers to me. Or was it easier because they were almost strangers and it didn't matter if I made a fool of myself? No. I wanted Janet to have a good opinion of me, and to make her parents consider me as a potential son-in-law, even if that was very premature.

Even that night I slept badly. I wasn't worried for myself. I was worried for Mr Owens, and by extension Sonja and Janet.

Saturday morning I shaved and showered carefully and put on my best suit. I arrived at the Registry Office before anyone else. An assistant registrar greeted me and showed me the room that would be used. I suggested that the aisle should be wider. Janet and Sonja's skirts spread and might catch on the chairs as they were. That was no problem for such a small wedding. He and I moved the chairs further apart. He was slightly puzzled at my role. So was I. I said I was the only Usher. I suppose I am.

Brian, the Groom, and Rory his Best Man arrived next. Brian thanked me for looking after Sonja and him at the party. I mentioned my worries about Sonja's Dad.

"I know, Colin," he replied. "I'm worried too. So is Sonja. It doesn't matter to either of us what he does or doesn't do. Just being here is enough for us. Sonja tells me you are being her Uncle Stuart. What does that mean?"

I explained I was the Bride's Father's support and the photographer. I took a couple of pictures of them in their best suits. Brian's parents arrived next. I took more photos while Brian explained his concerns about Sonja's Dad, and why I was there. They introduced themselves, thanked me for what I had done last Friday, and offered any help I might need.

I was beginning to think that Sonja's Dad was going to get more help than he needed. His wife, his two daughters, his future son-in-law, the Best Man, the Groom's parents, the other Bridesmaid and me were all there for him. His mother ought to be. His mother-in-law? She was my only worry. She wasn't sympathetic at the rehearsal.

The two grandmothers arrived by taxi and sat in the second row on the Bride's side. The Groom was nervous. I suggested that he, his brother and his parents could sit down too. I could tell them when the Bridal Party arrived.

Five minutes before the due time the Registrar arrived. She talked to the Groom and Best Man. I could see them relaxing as she spoke. She had done this many times before.

Three minutes to go and I saw Mary's car parking. Mrs Owens helped Sonja to get out and then walked up the aisle to sit on the front row. I didn't need to tell the Groom that Sonja had arrived. Mrs Owens' appearance was enough. He and the Best Man stood up.

I went into the antechamber. Sonja was holding her father's arm while Janet and Mary arranged her dress and picked up her train. I took pictures of the group. Her father looked white as a sheet.

"Ready, Mr Owens?" I asked. He didn't reply.

Sonja shook his arm slightly.

"Ready Dad?"

He didn't move.

"What do I have to do?" he asked in a quivering voice.

"Walk up the aisle, stop, and then stand beside Mum," Janet said calmly.

He didn't move. I tried a different approach.

"What you are doing is showing how much you love your daughter," I suggested.

"Daughters!" he emphasised. "I do -- love them. Let's do this."

We were all relieved when he set off down the aisle. The delay had only been about twenty seconds. I scuttled around to take pictures as they came towards the Registrar. Mr Owens was looking at Sonja. His expression showed how much he loved her and how proud he was. Under her veil she was smiling too. Over her shoulder Janet and Mary were beaming.

Mr Owens stopped in front of the Registrar. Brian came to stand beside his bride as Mr Owens steeped backwards, nearly tripping over Janet's skirt. She flipped it aside. He went and stood beside his wife.

I tried to be unobtrusive as I took pictures during the ceremony. That was difficult. I'm too large to be unobtrusive but no one seemed to mind. They were all watching Brian and Sonja.

Everything went smoothly to the end when the married couple walked out together followed by everyone else. But not me. I was walking backwards in front of them.

In the garden of the Registry Office I posed the group for the formal photographs, being as quick as I could because in was a cold December Day. I took more pictures as the Bride and Groom climbed into Mary's car, with Janet in the front seat.

They drove off and everyone else rushed to the parked cars. The two grandmothers were in my car as I was acting as Uncle Stuart, who should have driven them.

I couldn't believe it. I had only met Janet just over a week ago and now I was an essential part of her sister's wedding. Was I doing it for Janet? Or for my sister Mary? Or for Sugar-Plum Sonja? I didn't care. The wedding ceremony had been flawless. If the reception could be as trouble free? That would make my day, and Sonja's. Mary had stopped her car in a lay-by so that the rest of us would arrive at the restaurant first, and the Bride and Groom could make an entrance.

Julie, formally dressed as a waitress, met us at the restaurant entrance. She showed us a route away from the main area, through a conservatory directly to the private room. It was a stand-up buffet. There was a table for the Bride and Groom to sit behind, with other tables for the rest of us. Julie showed us who was sitting where. My place was next to Janet. The grandmothers were also on our table.

I told Julie that I would show the Bridal party the way. She nodded and starting pouring soft drinks.

I took more pictures of Sonja and Brian as they walked from Mary's car to the room, followed by the bridesmaids carrying her train. Once they had arrived and had sat down Janet and Mary brought them food and drink from the buffet. We stood around talking. Mrs Owens congratulated me on my support at the wedding. Mr Owens thanked me too, but he was looking nervous again. His forehead was glistening with sweat.

"I'll tell you when," I said. "I'll make sure everyone has a full glass for the toasts, and ask for silence for your speech. You've got it?"

He patted his breast.

"Yes, Brother Stuart, sorry Colin."

He could make a joke. That was a good sign. I waited until everyone had finished eating. It seemed that I had become the Toastmaster, the Master of Ceremonies. It still felt slightly unreal. A week ago I didn't know Sonja. Now I was arranging events at her wedding.

"Ready?" I asked Mr Owens. He nodded.

I picked up a jug of water and went around topping up glasses. I had to top up Mr Owen's glass twice.

I stood behind the Bride and Groom. Everyone looked at me expectantly. I didn't have to ask for silence. They all stopped talking.

"Ladies and Gentlemen?" I said. "The Bride's father."

Mr Owens stood up. He had the paper copy of his speech in his hand. He dropped it, blurted "I'm sorry" and dashed through the conservatory into the garden. Sonja looked horrified.

I followed him outside. He was leaning over a flower bed retching. Julie came out with a glass of water. She gave it to me.

"You don't have to do this," I said as he stopped heaving his stomach contents over the earth. I held out the glass to him. He sipped, straightened himself up, and then turned to be sick again.

Janet came beside me.

"What did you do, Colin?" she screeched at me. "Put vodka in his water? He's on Antabuse. This is his reaction to alcohol."

I was shocked by Janet's accusation. I didn't know what to say.

"Dad? Are you alright?" she asked.

He waved a hand as he spewed again. He obviously wasn't OK.

"I'll never forgive you, Colin," Janet hissed at me. "I don't want to see you again -- ever. Go away!"

Julie grabbed Janet's arm as it was raised to hit me.

"If you do that," Julie said fiercely, "I'll slap your face."

It seemed a feeble threat. Julie is so small and Janet is as tall as me. But it stopped Janet's movement.

"You too? I should have guessed. You want him. You can have him!"

Janet was still keeping her voice down.

Her father was waving an arm at her. She finally noticed.

"What is it, Dad?" She asked.

"It's NOT alcohol," he wheezed. "No one spiked my drink. It's just nerves. I'll be OK in a minute or two."

"I could have told you there was no alcohol," Julie said firmly. "This restaurant is alcohol free, and Colin had no opportunity to tamper with the drinks. You need to apologise to Colin. He has been doing his best for you and Sonja..."

Janet burst into tears. That caused a reaction in her father. He stood up, wiped his mouth with a paper tissue offered by Julie, and hugged Janet.

"There's no need for tears, Janet. I was nervous and my stomach reacted. Colin has been a great substitute for Stuart. You should thank him, not blame him."

He pushed Janet into my arms. She started crying against my shoulder. Julie was smiling at me. She gave me a thumbs up. Janet's Dad even managed a weak grin.

"Colin?" he said. "Can we try again?"

"Julie?" I asked. "Can you find his notes?"

They were in his hands in seconds. We walked back through the conservatory. Brian and Sonja watched as we entered. Janet was leaning against me, dabbing at her tears with a handkerchief. Her other hand was holding her father's. He lifted it, mimed a kiss on it, and walked to stand at the end of the bridal table. He nodded at me. I had an arm around Janet. She snuggled against me. I would have to take photographs one-handed.