All Comments on 'Santa's Homely Elf'

umm... okay, this piece has some interesting ideas, but the storytelling is a bit off. In a first place, you're rushing to the sex part, skipping the main dish - introduction to the main character, her inner world and so on. I didn't found anything I could care about.

You're telling your story in a very general way - this is North pole, that thing is Santa, those are elves, this is miserable Rum Raisin... Well, who the heck cares about that? Lets start with Rum Raisin and her daily life, her thoughts, her actions, her interaction with others. It would be very personal for a reader in this way. And "personal" means "interesting".

Forget about lightspeed travels to the sex planet. That is just boring like hell. Unless you know how to make such travels interesting, which I highly doubt.

Good luck next time.

Will you write more? I like your story

It was good. You just need to slow it down some, build up to the "action" some more. More character stuff would be a good thing too. I hope you continue this story, and maybe make longer chapters. I'd like to see the male elves' reaction to her no longer "servicing" their needs also. LOL

I thought the name Rum Raisin was so cute that I kept reading. This is not particularly my style but it was strangely captivating - I like things with a twist and this definitely had that!

p.s. check your word tenses. :)