by Isopropyl
Next story he needs a bisexual buddyto do hismomwith himand haveher help them have bi sex with each other and with mom.Mom caan enjoy two loads
You could so easily change this into a very erotic tale with a little effort,you need a proof reader.
people complan about everything and nothing.some are jealous of your writing.
Great story but like all of yours, the errors make for hard reading. Please use an editor and most if not all of your writing would be some of the best. But hell, I can hardly type myself so what am I complaining about. Nice work
The pee in mouth ruined an otherwise nice effort. Potential is there however with your writing.
Loved it but the pissing is not for me,some will like it,what is a complan?
toe was created by a tight covering over the lips. You get a '5' vote anyway.
Pissing in Mom's mouth may not be for every Mom and every son but it makes for a really delightfully kinky story. congratulations Isopropyl. Don't know about that handle. I definitely prefer ethyl.
The stories you write are good, but the typos take the flow away.
Also the dialogs and description are not completely separate, again interrupting the flow.
Having an editor would help a lot I believe.
Venus
Almost like two stories in one. could have been better if it was all consensual, should've just felt her up and jerked off, but pretty hot stuff.
Not a nice son when he rapes his Mom. Something like that could come back to haunt him, even if his Mom is a horny MILF.
I think buildup in a story is like foreplay in actual act. Using that comparsion the woman had to have been heated-up off screen by somebody else. She certainly wasn't subjected to foreplay. This was like wham, bam, thank you mam. On the positive side the basic story held promise to me. I gave you a three and encourage you to keep writing.