All Comments on 'Beach Volleyball Fun'

by DarkestLore

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  • 8 Comments
AnonymousAnonymousalmost 10 years ago
learn it

your- belonging to you

you're- contraction.. meaning you are

there- place.. put that sack over there.

their- belonging to someone.

they're- contraction.. they are

to- action... I went to the store.

too- also... I want to come too.

two- number following one

ValveoilValveoilalmost 10 years ago

I liked it, but some basic editing required. The shower scene was pretty hot.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 10 years ago
nice

nice story, the way it unfolded outweighed the minor mistakes....thank you

DarkestLoreDarkestLorealmost 10 years agoAuthor
Thanks so far

Thanks for the comments so far, was my first try at a story. I will try to keep improving, and to make sure I take the time to comb over every mistake in the future.

Carole_n_NiceCarole_n_Nicealmost 10 years ago
It is a little scary, isn't it?

It is a little scary, isn't it? I posted my first story a week ago and I've not been able to sleep sense. For me? I loved your story! Keep at it! Kisses.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 10 years ago
:)

I think you did a great job. Definitely held my attention. Hope there's sequel to follow! <3 Christy

missy7349missy7349over 9 years ago
Great story!

Please continue this story. Don't leave us hanging. We want more.

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

This was short but really good. The physical description of the characters was good. The build up was also good.

Good being the key word.

Anonymous
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